High Achievers

& Professional Woman

You are known as a goal-setter, go-getter, and you have high expectations of yourself that must be met. People know you as accomplished and successful, and this is important to you. It’s not uncommon for you to put your needs last, skip sleep, or avoid self-care to make sure everything is done perfectly. 

And although there are some benefits to being a high achiever and it has moments of feeling good, these emotions of worth and accomplishment are often fleeting. You struggle with an inner voice of always wanting/needing more, a constant feeling of restlessness, and possibly obsessive thoughts to finish something until it’s not just done, but done right. 

A constant need to achieve, do more, be better, and get it all done can be exhausting, lonely, and isolating. So where does it come from? And how can you lean into the strengths of this trait, while finding balance, peace, and true connection with yourself and others?

First, being accomplished as a professional, an athlete, or a go getter in your day-to-day life is not wrong. But when there’s an inner need inside of us to prove our worth, be the best, and mask anxiousness, we need to identify the root cause, work on it, treat it, heal it, and learn warning signs and triggers as we continue to be a successful woman. 

We need to assess where we get our worth from. Did we at some point in our life internalize that we must prove our worth by proving our importance, success, and intelligence that causes us to seek external validation? What core beliefs do we have about ourselves that causes us to not stop until we get it all done perfectly? 

Therapy helps to challenge deep core beliefs about ourself, our worth, and need for external validation. It helps us to recognize we can’t earn worth, but we do need to learn to accept it. Therapy also helps us to recognize we are more than our profession or achievement. When we learn to find balance with other areas of our life, we recognize we are not just one thing - we are not just a boss, entrepreneur, leader, co-worker, athlete, - we have several roles and identities that make up our whole. When we learn to lean into other areas of our lives, make boundaries, accept ourselves as we are and let other people in to see the true us (and accept us!), we can then achieve from a place of healthy motivation.

Through this process we learn to not allow our professional life define us. We can still be successful, intelligent, and a go-getter that gets stuff done - but our thoughts appear less obsessive, we seek less external validation, and we find other things in life that we enjoy and help give us purpose and identity. It is possible!